Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Hide & Seek

Hide and seek. It was their favourite game. He would hide, and she would seek. Over and over, they never tired. He would hide, and she would seek. And they would laugh in ecstatic joy at the end of the game.
Until one day, grinning ear to ear, she decided to hide.
He never sought.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Twist of Fate

He smiled as the last spurt of frantic bubbles escaped her lips and broke the surface. He let go of her now limp body, and stretching up, reached for the towel. The last sound he heard was the flicking of the hairdryer switch, dragged in by him as he slipped and fell into the tub.

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Tuesday, April 10, 2012

25 Years of Slightly Weirder but not Altogether Useless Wisdom

Photo Courtesy:
After bumming a lot of people out yesterday, and receiving collective groans for the same, I thought its maybe time for sharing some of the other stuff I’ve learnt in the past quarter of a century. 25 years is a long time, and believe me, when you’re me, you do a LOT of stupid things to learn from.

I’ve learnt that the nara (you know that string thing used to keep your churidar/shalwaar up?) on your pants will always end up in a double knot by the end of the day. The number and complexity of the above mentioned knot is directly proportional to your growing need to pee.

I’ve learnt that running through the open loo door without switching on the light in the middle of the night isn’t always the best idea. Specially when your room mate has a habit of shutting the before-mentioned-mistakenly-thought-open loo door.

I’ve learnt that a school skirt which has hooks on the side instead of a zip is a BAD idea. Specially when you have doors in the school with latches placed at the same curious height and angles as the slit in your skirt.

I’ve learnt that if you’re walking fast enough and get stuck on the door latch, it’s not so difficult to tear your skirt top to bottom.

I’ve learnt that you will notice the mould on the bread only when you're about to take the last bite.

I’ve learnt that when a door does not have a pull/push sign, I always do the opposite of what is actually required.

I’ve learnt that it’s ALWAYS a bad idea to keep your boss’s bbm chat window open on your cell. Specially if you’re discussing some rather naughty things with a friend on an adjacent chat window. Or what you thought was the adjacent chat window.

I’ve learnt that you don’t always dance the way you think you’re dancing. Not even close.

I’ve learnt that it is possible to finish a three kilo watermelon between three people. I’m not taking any guarantees for your stomach the next day though.

I’ve learnt that you’re never as fat as you think you are. Nor as thin.

But that pimple? It’s always as big and noticeable as you thought!

I’ve learnt that talking in office loos is NEVER a good idea.

I’ve learnt that once you put aside slippers because they’re old and worn out, you really shouldn’t pick them up out of a sudden feeling of endearment. Slippery slippers are a bitch. Specially on the steps at Andheri station.

I’ve learnt that the total number of expressions in most Hindi soap operas is five. So is the total number of creative ideas.

I’ve learnt that at least one character per soap opera has to get drunk on bhang near holi, and the effect lasts for at least an entire month worth of episodes.

I’ve learnt that watching a love-making scene on a Hindi soap opera with your grandmother is THE MOST EMBARRASSING situation EVER.

I’ve learnt that travelling is ALWAYS a good idea.

So is clean underwear.

I’ve learnt that it’s important to like your parlour lady. For a long period she may know you more intimately than anyone else.

I’ve learnt that Mumbai auto wala’s will never go anywhere, so it really doesn’t matter.

I’ve learnt that most Delhiites and Mumbaikars take it as an offence if you don’t necessarily hate one city and love the other.

I’ve learnt that climbing up a rusty old ladder without shoes isn’t the best idea in the world.

I’ve learnt that while ooh-ing and aah-ing at cute lil pups, it might be wise to pay attention to the growling dog behind you.

I’ve learnt that taking care of drunk people isn’t all that fun.

I’ve learnt that the scariest part about Mumbai locals is the not-so-slightly-built aunties, with their huge bosoms and even bigger bags. They aren’t scared to use either to fight their way to a seat.

I’ve also learnt that the scariest Mumbai local is the one to Virar.

I’ve learnt that Murphy was perhaps the best teacher we could have ever hoped for. In his rather arrogant statement meant to blame a technician on his team for screwing his work, he formulated the one truth that most of the world today lives by. If anything can go wrong, it will.

I’ve learnt that life being me is fun. Because frankly, anyone can be graceful, and sophisticated, and always perfectly fine in every possible way. But me? I’m a limited edition!!!

P.S. Now that I’ve started thinking, I have had a LOT of stupid and embarrassing things happen to me that I really have learnt from. Maybe I’ll keep adding to the list :D

Monday, April 9, 2012

25 Years of Wisdom

Twenty five.

That’s a big number. I always found it a little pompous and proud for being five squared. I’m not sure why. But two fives kinda made it arrogant. Like this annoying swollen headed jerk sneering down at you from its pedestal, far away.

Except it’s not so far away any more.
And the closer I get, the more jittery I get.
Because I’m beginning to realize that 20 was so much easier than 25.

At 20, I could get drunk, dance like a maniac, and be all stupid and it was ok. Because I was 20. And I could be all grown up and mature the next second and that was a wonder, because I was just 20.

And somehow all I seem to want to do now is run…run back to the days I had no worries, no emotions, no troubles…or run to the future, that beautiful time when everything will be alright, when cynicism would’ve been rendered useless, and optimism finally rewarded, and uncertainty banished.

And that’s why 25 is scary. It’s a roadblock you can’t get out of. One that forces you to stop, and think, and remember.

And learn.

I’ve learnt that it gets tougher to dream as you grow up. It isn’t as easy to say that one day you want to become the CEO of a big media company. Not unless you’re delivering. And it isn’t as easy to deliver as it used to be.
I’ve learnt that no dream is ever truly lost.
I’ve learnt that what people think does matter, even if you’d like to believe it doesn’t.
I’ve learnt that stereotypes exist for a reason.
I’ve learnt being a rebel without a cause has no glory.
I’ve learnt that causes sometimes cease to exist, abruptly.
I’ve learnt you can be numb for years, and then emotions can hit you like a wall of bricks you just didn’t see coming.
I’ve learnt that all the McDreamys, Chuck Bass’s, Oliver Barretts and Rhett Buttlers are at the end of the day, nothing but characters, created out of women’s fantasies.
And sometimes they aren’t.
I’ve learnt that cynicism gets you nowhere. But it only has your best interests at heart.
I’ve learnt that optimism can move the world. But hope can kill.
I’ve learnt that sometimes it’s good to wake up.
I’ve learnt that we spend our lives fighting our parents, trying to prove them wrong, but they’re right, most of the times anyway.
I’ve learnt that I can spend my life running away from who I was, and the decisions I have taken. But there isn’t a way that exists that I can run away from myself.
I’ve learnt that dreaming about being 24, with a huge salary cheque, a budding career while being married to the love of my life was a dream as silly as the notion of perfection.
I’ve learnt that life isn’t perfect, and it may never be.
I’ve learnt that perfection is over rated.
I’ve learnt that dreams need to sometimes be protected.
I’ve learnt that happiness is all that really matters.
I’ve learnt that most of us don’t know what really makes us happy.
I’ve learnt that I am weaker than I thought I was.
I also know I’m about to become stronger than even I knew possible.
I’ve learnt that being 25, with a tiny salary cheque, a career that seems to be headed downhill, and nowhere near marriage is what reality is.
And I’ve learnt there are many perspectives to reality.
I’ve learnt it’s never too late to start over.
Above all, I’ve learnt that being 25 is not about looming deadlines, about lost dreams, about a plan gone terribly wrong.
It may have taken some broken bones, some really bad reviews, a lot of tears and pain.
But it’s about realising that I'm 25, and even though life didn’t exactly turn out the way I’d thought, it turned into something different, something new.
It’s about realising that I'm alive, and kicking.
And I'm not alone.
And there's way too much in store for me to even think of stopping now.

Photo courtesy:
P.S. This isn't my best piece of writing, and I know it. It's just that too many things have been worrying me lately, and I really needed them out of my head, once and for all. So now I can go back to my usual happy-go-lucky-even-if-slightly-cribby writing :D
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