Saturday, September 24, 2011

Of Pinky Woes and Other Things

So here’s one of those completely random disconnected posts that I truly believe one day I shall become the Master and the Queen of (Weirdly the only thing I’m wondering currently is whether Master and Queen should have started with capital M and Q respectively or not, huh?). Actually, to understand the genesis of such posts, the most basic explanation that I can offer at the root of it all is simply that I suddenly think of way too many things to write about, all interesting enough to feature in my head, but not interesting enough to actually stick in my head for an entire post. Whew, that was a long sentence, wasn’t it? But made sense, didn’t it?

Anyhow, my head’s recently been nice enough to point out the tiny little changes that have been taking place in my life. You know, those little changes that some annoying part of your head notices, and you sshhhh it up, because, clearly, that part is demented. So what if I suddenly have a love for shoes, and happen to own a few pretty pairs. And oh well, thanks to my flat mate’s generous donation, I have some rather flowery tops, and well, they’re obviously not black. And well, my room currently has stuffed toys. And some cute red things.  And I like dresses. But hey! That’s called looking good…has nothing to do with changing from being a dude, to well, you know, err…a girl? Oh wait. This blog is currently pink. Which is totally the latest most masculine colour ever. *rolls eyes*

Oh, and talking about pink…you know that farthest little finger that you have…that rather useless thing you never pay attention to? Specially the one on your left hand, unless you’re left-handed, then your right-hand. And if you’re ambidextrous, well, take your pick amigo…Anyway, coming back to the point, what I really wanted to say was, PAY ATTENTION TO THAT LITTLE PINKY! It happens to be rather important. And you happen to notice it only when it’s in a plaster and out of action. Don’t believe me, do you, you cynical fool? Well, you will one day, when it’s gone, and you realize that the hand bidet in the loo happens to be on your left. Or when the zip of your dress goes all the way up in the back, and the only way to zip-unzip is to squirm your way through it and use all the flexibility of both your arms and hands. Now, try it with one hand. Hah! (Sigh, yes, I know, you might want to go and Google ‘bidet’. It’s ok, I’m not going anywhere. And yes, I know, you were probably more intelligent than to buy a dress with a zip at the back. But. Oh. Well.)

My cupboard is rather overflowing right now and begging to be cleaned and organized. Me, the supposedly awesomely organized person, is going to let it beg till Sunday, I think.

Oh, ever played the game of LIFE? I happen to be a fan. But somehow in my version have lost quite a few of those pink and blue pegs signifying people, and hence always end up running rather short of the correct gender by the end of it. Thus enter same-sex marriages. Advanced, my game of LIFE is, I tell you.

Now, I had something else to write about, but somehow in the middle got distracted by someone posting the Twilight – Breaking Dawn trailer on Facebook. For those who haven’t read the books, and those idiots who actually like the series, here’s the summary of this part in not so many kind words: Bella marries vampire. Werewolf angry. Vampire+human go for honeymoon. Vampire regularly breaks the bed, the wall, everything while concentrating on his fun-time during the honeymoon, because well, he’s sooooo strong, and little-human-Bella could be torn and broken into two. But hey, sex is important, so he exercises super mind-over-matter-type-yoga control and ends up breaking everything but her during it. Oh, and of course super vampire sperm impregnates her. And this being a super vampire-human mutant baby grows rather fast, and oh, in the process starts eating Bella from inside, and breaks a few bones kicking around. Awesome sauce, no?

I’m sorry, but that book series just took feminism back quite a few decades. Stephenie Meyer hit the nail so hard on the head that all those wannabe feminists drooled and fainted on the spot. Truth is, I’m no one to judge. I did after all read the whole series, even if I was scorning it throughout (Couldn’t get past the really bad acting in the movies though). But apart from it being my supposed ‘research’ for why the hell girls fall for this book, well, maybe I did enjoy it one tiny little bit somewhere inside. It really makes me wonder. Are all girls by default wired deep in their heads as helpless and clumsy little things that need a sexy vampire to save them and make life worth it? And then we grow up and bury that deep inside and pretend to be all strong and independent and subscribe to the women-of-today type crap?

While in reality, maybe, all we really want in life is our own perfect Edward Cullen.
After all, this blog is pink.

P.S. While I just infuriated the feminist world out there by that last thought, please do note, I’m just pointing out a few hypocrisies in myself. I did almost puke a few times in those books. But I did read all four. *blushes*

P.P.S. Ok, so the blog isn't pink anymore. How long did you expect that one to last now, really?

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